Sunday 22 February 2015

The Sunday Natter: why body shaming needs to stop


I don't usually touch on subjects like this but when something's on my mind, I always feel the need to express my erratic thoughts and what better place than my blog on a Sunday Natter day? The idea of this topic was promoted by a controversial hashtag floating around Twitter on Friday. I'm pretty certain the majority of you already know what I'm talking about, but if not then I'll give you a brief insight. #SkinnyBirdWatching was a highly inappropriate move by Taking Shape, thinking spotting 'size 6 non average for a model girls' at London Fashion Week would be an inoffensive and acceptable idea. How wrong they were. I really don't understand how you can promote size positivity, whilst slating and humiliating the opposite, smaller body type. Putting down a range of size and shapes to praise another is not the way forward. Negative commenting on how 'awfully skinny' a person is, is just as bad as upsetting a person for their heavier weight. They are equally offensive. There is no right or wrong shape. We were all born and built differently and that's why the world is so diverse, because we're all unique and have individual qualities.

Unfortunately, we do live in a generation where there is a standard definition of beauty. Browsing at the online catalogue models, walking past Victoria Secret adverts and making note of the catwalks, you'll realise there's one certain look that is supposed to represent everyone. We all know that's wrong but that's just how it works and that's why we need to support each other more than ever. Us women already deal with enough pressure by the media and the hostile reality, we don't need resentfulness added to the list. I'm certainly no where near self-assured about my appearance which is why I feel so strongly about women sticking together and working towards building confidence instead of unnecessarily demeaning each other. What's worse is, people don't even realise they're doing it. We do live in a beauty obsessed era but we also live in 2015, filled with ever developing attitudes, and thinking you are correct in believing one certain size should be the focus means you need to open your eyes, and quickly.

You are not defined by a number. Whether you're a size 6 or a 26, I don't see how it matters or makes any difference to who you are. It's okay to be super slim, it's okay to be curvy, by god it's okay to be any formation you want to be. If you want to make changes and decisions for your own benefit, go ahead and if you want to stay the same, you carry on doing that. As long as you're happy in your own skin, you go strutting past that mirror with your head held high. There is no such thing as normal, there is no clarification of the word normal. You can't judge someone based upon this. Everyone has a personal preference and let's be honest, life would be a dull place if everybody was the same. If there's one term I absolutely hate, it's the 'real women' logic. I'm sorry, but who gives instructions on what should be included in the recipe of a woman? There's no rules for that. More importantly, how can you destroy someone's perception of themselves by what you think is ideal on the outside? There is so much more to a person than their size, weight and appearance and that doesn't take away the other beautiful traits they may carry. I hate the fact we feel the need to put labels on people. Whether you're smaller or larger, it doesn't make you any less of an attractive person, especially when seen from the eyes of others. Being forced upon to look a certain way is not suitable for someone's well being. Body shaming in both directions does no justice to confidence whatsoever. It doesn't make someone feel better stating their size is rated higher than the other and it's not fair that we should be categorised this way.

Not every weight is medically healthy, I know. Being both severely underweight and overweight can be dangerous but that doesn't instantly mean you can point a finger and shame someone for what they look like. There may be underlining issues, a reasoning for it, or they may just be simply, naturally made this way. Your insults and snide comments will get you nowhere in life and can affect a person much more than you think. Tell me this; would someone receive optimism from a statement of 'only a dog goes for bones'/'promoting bigger bodies is not a good thing' or would they be more satisfied with the point that, whatever our size, we are all important and empowering and deserve to be comfortable in our own skin? I read somewhere that society will do everything in its power to convince you that your personal happiness is dependent from something external and it's so true but this isn't the case. Making the conscious decision to be happy and to pass a casual compliment on a daily basis will make you and the receiver feel better, for sure. Always be nice to yourself and be nice to others, you'll get so much more out of life. That's my motto

What are your thoughts regarding this situation?

Bridie x
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4 comments

  1. i think what you wrote here is truly beautiful and you really highlighted an important issue, amazing post! im thinking of doing something similar on my blog after my modelling experience, so inspiring to see other girls talkign about this :)


    ♥ Ellen #NZblogger
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  2. I loved this post.
    It makes me sad that woman are so harshly judged by weight.
    I believe we should be the size that makes us happy…not what society says we should be!

    Jenn from jenniferjayne.blogspot.co.uk

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  3. wow i love this psot
    These words are so true!
    women should love their Body

    hope you too visit my Blog <3
    http://miss-amelyrose.blogspot.de/

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  4. This is a wonderful post! Body shaming seems to happen at all sizes - as someone who isn't particularly 'thin' but not technically plus-sized either, I sort of feel it from both ways. It needs to stop!

    Milly // Mini Adventures

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